Last week on American Idol's results show, Carrie Underwood sang Jesus, Take The Wheel. I liked it so much I went out and bought her CD. (Side note: This week, Bo Bice sang ...something. I did not go and buy his CD.) In a weird similarity with my big bro, I rarely like an entire CD when I first listen to it. This one was no different. Jesus, Take The Wheel is the fourth track; I found myself bumping ahead to it or back to it instead of listening to the other songs. I eventually (as it usually goes) found a new favorite. It's called Before He Cheats:
Right now
he's prob'ly slow dancin'
with some bleach-blonde tramp
and she's prob'ly gettin' frisky.
Right now
he's prob'ly buyin' her
some fruity little drink
'cause she can't shoot whiskey.
Right now
he's prob'ly up behind her
with a pool stick showin'
her how to shoot a combo.
Oh, but he don't know....
That I dug my key into the side
of his pretty little souped-up four-wheel drive
carved my name into his leather seats
took a Louisville Slugger to both headlights
slashed a hole in all four tires
Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats!
Ha ha ha. There are, of course, other verses, but you get the gist of it. I love this song. I have no idea why; I (think I) am lucky enough to say no boyfriend of mine ever cheated on me. But there's something about the justice in her response to his infidelity that is entertaining to me.
Funny, but if this actually happened, she'd be totally responsible for the damages and she'd look like the bad guy. I mean, can you imagine Josh taking a report from a man who explained that his ex basically totaled his vehicle? She's a complete psycho in that light. I don't care, though; I still love this song!
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